Dateline – Milwaukee Brewers Clubhouse – Earlier today Mike Cameron signed a one year rental agreement with the Milwaukee Brewers. Here’s a fly on the wall account of it’s aftermath…
(Doug Melvin and Mike Cameron are holding each other close)
(Tony Gwynn Jr. bursts in)
– You son of a biscuit eating bulldog!
– What the French, toast?
– Did you think I would not find about your little doo doo head cootie queen?
– Who are you calling a cootie queen, you lint licker?
– Pickle you, Kum Quat!!
– You’re over-reacting.
– No, Doug. Over reacting was when I put your convertible into a wood chipper, Stinky Mc Stink face! (dumps box containing the remains of Doug’s car on the carpet)
– YOU HOBOKEN!!
(Gwynn tries to pull Mikes hair as Doug attempts to hold them apart)
– Fabulous New Free Agent Signing cleans another dirty mouth, For a good clean feeling, no matter what!
**Postscript to uninspired ripoff of a gum commercial**
I probably could’ve gone with a doublemint ad, because the only way I can tell Gwynn and Cameron apart is by the hat they’re wearing. They both even wear the brim of their cap the same way. They both smile the same way. I can’t wait for Cameron’s Brewers headshot to come out, so that I can try to tell the difference when Mike is not wearing a Padres cap.